Vendor Lock-In

“Then I’m afraid were just going to have to cut our looses – for the moment anyway – before something truly awful happens and switch it off.”

“Switch it off?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, very good.”


Following an upgrade of the BBC’s cutting-edge Syncopatico in-house operating system its syncopaticaption intelligent live subtitling software is still doggedly refusing either to learn from its mistakes or to give up and switch itself off.

“As I say I’m not technical, but would it help if I put a hammer through some of this crap in here?”


“I’m not being funny – I’m including you in that.”

“So one thing that’s really impressive about 2.0…”


“… is that, once it’s up and running, it’s design to be pretty much bomb-proof.”

“What does that mean?”

“You can literally pull the plug and it’ll keep going.”

“I don’t believe this.”

“So the thing with fail-safe protocols these days… I mean they’re brilliant, don’t get me wrong, they’re pretty much close to perfect as long as everything works fine.”


“But the second something starts to go wrong – which technically can’t happen, by the way – to be honest, you kind of miss the off button. Do you know what I mean?”


“I know. Who’d have thought?”


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